>You are Treads Softly
>Filly
>And most importantly
>The BEST tank commander!
“Rrrrrmmmmbbbmbmbmmmmll”

>And by your side was your BEST driver, Little Star!
“We’ll show ‘em today, Little Star!”
>His plush head droops slightly
“I know I say that all the time, but we really will today! I have a secret weapon!”

>You present the most powerful round your behemoth could ever fire
>It was FOUR PLY
>The Guard will HAVE to take you seriously now!
>Tanks ARE real!

>You traverse the yard in your unstoppable cardboard juggernaut

>You grind to a halt
“Eeeeeeee!”

>Your screeching brakes catch the attention of a pegasus guard immediately
>”Oh! Hello little filly! Quite the impressive armor you have today! Is that a new cannon?”

>You nod gleefully, ready to explain the robust composition of the new main cannon
>You got it from a post office!
“Sure is, Mister Sir! This one can fire a new round I made!”

>”Who’s this brat? Why is she boxed up like a present?”
“BRAT!?”
>”Oh, hey Siqueue! Did you want to see little Tread’s new heavy armor?”
>”…Her what?”

>”Her heavy armor? She calls it a tank!”
>”That’s completely rid-“

>Nopony calls you a BRAT!
>You load the 4 ply payload into your main cannon
“GUNNER, FIRE!”
>Siqueue cocks his head to the side
>”Huh?”