Can you believe that nearly a year later I still get people coming to me saying 'BUT THAT'S NOT HOW IT'S SUPPSOED TOBY!!!!1!!!1!!2

Truth be told, it doesn't really bother me; people have their opinions, I love arguing, it works out for everyone. Still, I often find myself repeating myself repeating myself. SO! I figured I'd give people what they wanted; but at the cost of illustrating a point:

Why I don't care for these matchups.

As an overview, my big problem with most of these crossovers was that for each bit of sense they make, there is a gaping scar in the ration used to defend them that people often seem to think should be ignored. These matchups pick and choose which character traits to ignore and to expand upon unevenly; taking one trait and ignoring it in one character, then focusing on that same trait in another, even when said trait is no more or less present in either.

For the record, I don't have a problem with the popular setup; I just don't like it is all. :P Even much less now that I've had hundreds of bronies hell bent on telling me why they think it's right. XD


TWILIGHT SNOIPAH:
Be polite. Be efficient. Have a plan to friendship everypony you meet.
While I won't argue a sniper needs to know his stuff, I will say that when the Soldier can build a bazooka from garbage, we can safely assume every class is an expert in their particular field of interest; for this reason, I disregarded Sniper's 'weaponized math' nature, and when trying to find a class for Twilight, looked for a class that broke the mold by having an expanse of knowledge beyond their particular purpose; hence, Engineer and Medic (the latter of which expressed interest in learning magic). In essence, Sniper actually undermines Twilight's intelligence to focus on said intelligence; it's self-contradictory.

The idea of taking a princess/scientist/magician who turns animals into oranges, teleports, and lives in a magical library (now a crystal castle), has studied magic and friendship for years and making her into a class whose job is to hide and shoot seemed underwhelming; especially given Twilight's always one to lead a charge.

Aesthetically, I could simply not negotiate Twilight's nature with Sniper's Crocodile Dundee setup; the only items that I could see her using of his are the Outback Intellectual and Sir Hootsalot.

For me, Twilight had to be either Engineer or Medic. They're the only two classes that feel right, even if only a third of Engi's items fit her.

Twilight Sparkle is wearing the Snaggletooth, Koala Compact, and for added effect, her Princess Regalia.


ENGINEER-JACK:
Not problems like what is beauty; because that would fall under your pur-whatsit of your philundroms of colonoscopy! Wait… I think I said that wrong…
Southern accents basically condemned Applejack to a role as Engineer in the hearts and minds of many stubborn (and more than a little butthurt) bronies. Ever since I drew Twilight-Engi, this group labeled me their Arch-Nemesis (and nobody's written an evil theme song for me yet!)

With his accent and an assortment of Texas-styled items, it seems impossible to challenge Apple-Engi; indeed, some might wonder why I bothered. The answer, of course, being that the other half of his set is very sciency; and Applejack is not a sciency pony. Additionally, Applejack just strikes me more as a physical pony than a gadgeteer; Engi can realistically lose a one-on-one fight with a Medic (often portrayed as Fluttershy) without his sentries.

The biggest fall for me on this matchup comes from the aesthetics, admittedly. How is it that stubborn gentleman who blocked me for throwing his own game in his face used to do it…? Oh yes!

:icontwilightsparkleplz:
'Dominated, Booksmarts!'
'Dominated, you cactus eating egghead!'

I won't say Applejack is dumb, but she's hardly the genius of the bunch.

Applejack is wearing the Brainiac Hairpiece, the Googly Gazer, and the Special Eyes, and is wielding the Eureka Effect.


FLUTTERMEDIC:
Oops, that was not kindness!
I blame Meet the Medic for ruining this matchup for me; until then I thought he was your typical war doctor. Now, I picture him as a guy who… well… conducts ethically questionable experiments on his friends for curiosity's sake.

I find the argument for Fluttershy's kind, harmless nature as Medic funny, because despite it, most people depict Fluttershy as more like the Medic when she's drawn, gleefully cutting her friends open and whatnot, rather than as herself (shy, cowardly, reserved). It also assumes you just play pocket Medic and don't defend yourself even when your pocket is dead and it's shoot or die. Plus, kill assists; the Medic is just as responsible for killing his patient's enemies as his patients are for using guns to kill them (or so I reason). Medic is often target number one for a reason; as long as he's alive, he's trouble. His mere presence is a threat.

Plus, of the support classes, he's the most dangerous without relying on assassination; his CQC skills are greater than Spy's or Sniper's (who rely on either snappy headshots or face-stabs to win a fight against an enemy who has gotten close and/or spotted them).

Aesthetically, the scientifically inclined morbid doktor could not be more different from nature-loving, tree hugging Fluttershy. No matter what role she fills, Fluttershy will have to be negotiated with death and character; same as everypony else.

Plus, Fluttershy running around in the thick of battle while Applejack hides in a base with a sentry nest and Twilight hides behind barrels and corners just seems off.

Fluttershy is wearing the Das Maddendoktor (sans funky hair) and the Quadwrangler.


DEMOZECORA
One wayward pinch of Potassium Chlorate would be enough to seal my fate!
I'm going to be perfectly honest; I originally thought Twilight made a better Demomare than Zecora. Then it changed to Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and at one point Derpy (if only because her Monoculus would be hilarious). The argument of Zecora as Demo is that she knows how to mix things…. what that argument ignores is what she mixes. Zecora specializes in herbs and plants; she's a medicine mare. While it's not too far fetched to mix her herbalism into the bomb making business (magical ponies, wouldn't be surprised if they had an exploding plant somewhere in there) what seemed off for me is the bomb thing, once more, because she's a medicine mare and likely fits more as Medic.

Aesthetically, I think my biggest problem here is that the Demoman has a family history of bomb-makers, a legacy, and holds his family dear to his heart (as evidenced by the fact that, despite living in a mansion, he still lives with his mum). Zecora has none of those that we are made aware of (tho I'd love to learn more about her; she seems like she must have some interesting past as a potion maker). The only thing I can relate these two with is that, considering her balancing act on the bamboo pole, I imagine she's a capable melee combatant.


PINKIE PYRO
Mmmf mmmpf mm mmrfmmmrmrrf!
I will be perfectly honest; I cannot really argue against Pinkie Pyro. It fits. Both are nutty, both have fun, etc.

The reason I didn't choose it, however, is because it was boring.

Pinkie Pie is loud, abnoxious, and hides toys and stuff all over town. Pyro just runs around corners, sets things on fire, and blows things off cliffs; fun and all, but fairly limited, in my mind, for the pink party pony. I feel that the Pyro restricts what one can do with Pinkie, and that's why I'd choose just about any class (because Pinkie can basically fit all of them) before Pyro.



Sorry that that was a lot; you won't believe how many people actually argue with me about this. If I didn't find thrill in argument (for a short while anyway) I dare say I might ignore some of them! XD