(RD) Yo! It's the real R.D., Bringin' it back from the street, off the beat Bringin' heat, meltin' sheets of snowfall and sleet. Don't need to check a watch to tell the time, 'Cause we know what's hot that's on ya mind. So sit back while we yammer. Iron gets heated, bring down the hammer. It's goin' down, gettin' down, got a whole lot of that rhythm goin' round, get that sound, we intend to
(chorus) Rap this winter up! (x4)
(TS) Squashes, squashes, squashes, squashes, squashes Not the soup from your crotches Carnival, turban, delicata and banana type So many unknown kinds, mess with your fuckin' mind Who the hell wants to buy any kind of squash other than, the acorns, the butternut and pumpkins? With their sturdy skins, hard to cut them in, They should all be banned, these fruits are not your friends.
So I'm not joshin', winter squashes, better watch' em, take 'em down a notch, 'cause I'll botch 'em They keep forever but I really don't know whether that's a blessin' or it's really just a curse 'cause after every winter Quarter, I really just mourn the, sort of performance, that squash places on us, yeah, you Slice 'em, roast 'em, puree them in a stew, When you're stuck with squashes there ain't really much to do.
Though some think other ways, I don't think it's hard to say That every single motherfuckin' squash does taste the fuckin' same Maybe a consequence, so that's what happens when, you stuck in eatin' em up every fuckin' day, and I say
(chorus) Rap this winter up! (x4)
(RD) Now repeat after me! Curling is not a real sport! Curling is not a real sport! Curling is not a real sport! And if you disagree, you might just be a few eggs short But I really just don't know / what you expect If all you've got to work with's a ski set, Yeah, it's time to go / and maybe take a rest and give the winter sports a reset.
The skiiers all bragged, that I could watch a mare fly, But like a radio ad, you've got limits on your air-time Flyin' laps 'round your ass, soaring way up in the clear sky, Cut the crap, it's a fad, 'cause you mares can't even compare I'm, Not their kind, I fly very high, I'm seein' tubers in the ground they don't like scary heights,
You buy air by the second, like that's so impressive, if you ever press 'em, then they get to fessin' that they're dressed in snow that's wettin', these foals they messin' with, testin' it, 'cept that I'm no foal who's fresh in it, so they'll just have to take a fuckin' lesson I am the best of the best, I don't need your acceptance, I am better than rest so just keep your neck in, I'm Joe fuckin' Pesc'in, this court is in session, here just you listen (Everything that guy just said is bullshit.)
The sports are lamer when the sun is tamer Skier, or sleigher? They all work the same, but I don't need to lie, I'm floatin' like a butterfly But takin' ya twice as high (Now read the fucking rainbow.)
(chorus) Rap this winter up! (x4)
(AJ) Rappin' up winter, 'cause winter needs to back up Shovelin' into, the snow I don't like that stuff It's fun for all the foals, with their snowballin' plans but it's blockin' up the roads, more tedious than fun Walkin' down the street in your heavy duty boots Keepin' all the frost from stickin' to your hooves, And if you hear a shuffle, you're already feelin' dread Bam, icicle to the back of your head
Hear that, that's the sound of my whole day gone 'Cause a roofing on a house just done caved on Somepony's head and now I got to head down with Mac, it's all impromptu And not to say nothin' 'bout the crops, 'cause with all this snow, the farm has mothafuckin' stopped, It's all frozen, don't you know it's hard to grow in, ten C below and I been movin' so much snow, you think I'm rollin' in the dough
Burstin' pipes 'cause someone closed the faucet Frostbit crops don't tend to turn a profit So if I just may step up and say somethin' Good riddance to the winter