Look, it's Salix! Before her name was Salix, that is ;) I wanted to draw her backstory before I do the proper next gen reference sheet, because I would have to write some of it there anyway, and wanted to present it more nicely. So here; one first seven years of a backstory, fresh from the oven just for you! :) Who are her parents? Why is her name Salix? Why did she start working at Magifaunia, and why is she so secretive about her past?? …One of those will be answered here at least! :D

———————

1)
“Excuse me, Mr… Flim Skim and Flam Scam? There was, uh…. something…. left at the Equestrian embassy in Saddle Arabia, addressed to you two.”

Flim and Flam had been down on their luck for a while now. After they couldn’t help but use some shadier methods to increase profits at the resort, getting caught, and having their assets confiscated, they’d… had a hard time getting going again.

They’d even travelled outside of Equestria, trying their luck in Prance, Saddle Arabia, Griffonstone (they would have felt right at home, except that it turns out griffons were experts at avoiding scams)… even Yakyakistan. But after years, they still had a net gain of zero. More optimistic ponies might say it was also a net loss of zero, but the brothers didn’t much enjoy living on the edge.

So they returned home. Hoping that they could mooch off their family for long enough to build some funds for their next scheme.

None in their family even looked at their letters, each they sent was right back with “return to sender” scrawled across the envelope.

Buck.

On top of that, they’d now been summoned to the mayor’s office of the town they were, uh, camping nearby. A summons with a royal seal. …It wasn’t an arrest, right? Didn’t look like one. Plus, they didn’t think they’d done anything illegal since the last time they got caught. So… might as well see what the crown wants with them on their own terms.

—-

“Why… is that foal on a leash?”

“Oh, Safa’s well… while she is less than a moon old, she’s also half horse. And that means—”

Skitterskitterskitter—

“…we’ve already had to chase her down the street twice.”


Okay.

Okay okay okay okay.

When the official they’d met in the mayor’s office said that something had been left for them at the embassy in Saddle Arabia, they’d thought… Okay, they honestly hadn’t had any idea what it could have been.

But they never would have guessed—

Actually, honestly… considering their memories of the place, maybe they should have guessed ‘a baby’.
Still.

An entire foal.

Which, according to the case-worker they met with, had been left at the embassy with a letter claiming that the foal was “one of those Flim-Flam-scam bothers’, but not sure which one it was”

So yes. A foal.

Do they know which one of theirs she is? Does one of them want custody? A relation test spell might be needed, but if one of them is a match, that should be enough to…

You’re, uh, looking mighty pale there, sirs.

Maybe you should just take a day to go home and think about this, okay?


2)

“So. An idea struck me just now brother. Something that might solve our current… dilemmas.”

“Oh? Please, share.”

“Our dearest mother hasn’t read any of our letters, no?”

“Just sent them back unopened, yes.”

“Well, brother. What does mother always wish for more than anything? What did she always complain about during family reunions?”

“…I think I see where you are going with this, brother. And she does not know what the letters contained.”

“Indeed! So what if, her favourite little colts came a-knocking—”

“-asking why she didn’t want to see her own granddaughter? Why, we’d been trying to contact her for ages now-”

“-to tell her the good news! But seeing as she just turned all our letters away, we had to come in person-”

“-using up all of our last money we were going to use as a down payment! And now that we came so far and gave so much-”

“—how can she kick us and an innocent foal out into the cruel, cold world?”

“… I believe this will work, brother.”

“I agree. Only one worry then.”

“Indeed. What to do once the foal outgrows its usefulness? I do not wish to be saddled with the bits needed for raising one.”

“Can we not just return it?

“…can we?”

After some quick research they found that, yes, yes they could. Oh, it would mean their odds of being allowed to adopt in the nearer future will decrease dramatically, but they can live with that. Equestria does not want scenarios where someone keeps a child they do not want, in order to avoid negative consequences, so there really aren’t any. Aside from losing any rights to seeing the child, but that’s the entire point sooo…

Of course they want to take in the child. Why, they love children, and they cannot abandon their own flesh and blood now, can they?

Now only one question remained.

“Is it yours or mine?”

—-

Turns out that they both had memories of possible mothers. So they really had absolutely no idea which one of them was the father.

Here’s the issue with that; while there is the aforementioned relation test spells, it's not very precise at all. It can only tell if you share over a certain amount of genetic markers, not if that means the other person is your sibling, parent, aunt, cousin… second cousins are far away enough that it often returns a false negative. Either way; definitely not precise enough to tell which of two brothers fathered a baby. Much less identical twin brothers. Regardless of who actually fathered her, genetically the foal is just as related to one as the other. So the spell would probably mark one of them as being closer, but it would just be random because of its imperfect nature.

If one of them wants custody, they’ll have to take the spell at least once. But…

You know, flipping a coin is much quicker than having to do it twice.


3)
Okay, so Safa is now officially the daughter of Flim! Perfect!

Except… look, the name “Safa” is very pretty, very nice, very… but it’s not exactly ‘on brand’ now, is it?

Hmm…

“Fiddle Diddle”, now that’s a proper name!


4)
“Why, when we heard her mother abandoned her, my brother just had to swoop in and rescue her! I helped of course —we couldn’t just let my niece go to some stranger, now could we?”

“Oh, of course not! Hi there, aren’t you a cutie?”

“Yes, she is, isn't she? Why, I can hardly wait for when my brother has to run errands so I get to spend some one-on-one with my favourite niece! What do you say, Fiddle?”

“Bah!”

“Awwwwww!”

Turns out, Fiddle was good for more than just making their family accept them back. Apparently, nothing inspires more trust than someone holding a cute baby when they’re trying to scam —ahem, sell something to you.

Before she could talk, they included her in their schemes. Dressed up as a mascot for whatever product they were peddling that week, front-and-center playing with said product when they were toys of some kind, carried around on their backs to make ponies approach and coo. Also, “Where were you last night?” now had the convenient answer of “Home with my baby/niece of course!”

They didn’t mention it out loud, but both had to admit that she was growing on them. Only as a useful way of scamming people of course!

…And you know, it could be fun to train up a protegé of their own. Purely to pass on their legacy of how to fleece some rubes, of course; can’t let such valuable knowledge go to waste. No other reason.


5)

“Do you remember all the words to the song?”

“Yes, Daddy.”

“That’s my girl! Now, let’s get out there and..?”

“Be adorable!”

—

Fiddle: He’s Flim, and he’s Flam,
FnF: With Fiddle we’re three,
All: Gather round, sir and ma’am,
Join us now, come and see—

Flim: Our marvellous,
Flam: stupendous,
Fiddle: and really cool!,
All: Travelling sales ponies familyyyy!

Her helpfulness didn’t stop once she actually could talk though. No, it increased dramatically; what’s more adorable than a pony carrying a foal around when trying to sell you stuff? A foal trying to sell you stuff! Oh, they had to spend quite some time teaching her how to do it, but they’re experts so she learned quickly. Plus, she had their genes; of course she’d be great at it! She could sing and dance like the best of them, make puppy-dog-eyes that melted ice and knew the best sales pitches by heart before she could read.

Flim wouldn’t admit it out loud, but he was quite happy to have won that coin-flip. That was his daughter out there scamming people like a pro!


6)

“You already got your cutie mark!?”

“Yeah!”

“You’re only seven —that’s the earliest I’ve ever heard of anypony getting their mark!”

“I did, I got it earliest!”

“Of course you did! You’re my girl, aren’t you?”

“Ha! ‘My niece’ you mean, I got mine two minutes before you! She got her brilliance from me.”

“It was my idea that led us to get our marks in the first place! Her genius comes from me!”

“I’m both genius and brilliant!”

“Haha! Yes you are!”

Once Fiddle got her mark -in the first one percent of the normal distribution of ages!- Flim and Flam couldn’t be prouder! Though, of course their protegé would be ahead of the curve; they were her teachers after all.

A cute-ceañera was held, of course, and if the event operated at a loss… Well, it was marketing, they tell each other. The expensive new dresses they got her? Investment; gotta look her best when working, of course. The new guitar? Gotta practise their songs. The giant cake with Fiddle’s favourite flavour…? Okay, they had no excuse for that one.

Aside from that, they also helped her pick out a new name. She could keep Fiddle if she wanted to, of course, but it’s better branding if your name matches your cutie mark. (…They had the excuse of being twins, so their names should match for recognizability, shush now.) And seeing as her cutie mark resembled a flower, they brainstormed up “Orchard Orchid” —it’s an alliteration, fits her cutie mark and ties her back to her dad’s and uncle’s apples a bit. It was perfect!

From here, they had everything planned out; Fid- Orchid would continue with school, as the law required, and then spend her evenings and summers with her favourite dad and uncle, learning the proper lessons one needs in life. She'd grow up smart, crafty and ready to take on the world and its bounty of easy marks!


Yes, the future sure seemed to be looking bright for Orchid and her family :D