"What, you hate rap music? Then fuck you! You're fucking boring! Boring, boring, bor- bawk bawk ba-gawk!"

And that's how the blue chicken that ruined my life came to be! Blue and annoying, like this fool who threw a microphone at me.

My mind was already going down the toilet, hence me eating up a microphone á̶̛̝̬̰̖͈̥̖͌̓̌̃͐͗̕ş̸͉͈̼̫͚͖̌̏̇ ̵̡̢͈̝̜̣̼͉̺͈͉͂̀̌̋̈́͗̉̎̿͝Ḯ̷̙͓͙̦̼͇̏̏̈́̓̈͋͠ ̷̯̟̩̳̙̗͗̆̎̈͗̽̏̍̽̀͐͘͝ẁ̴̪͍̠̞̝̞̬̹̣̟͆a̷͕̯̺̐̓̈́̿̄̈́̄̕͝͠t̶̼͉͚͚̝͖̻̘̜̩̙͛̃͛̿̓́͑̈̈̐̕c̵̨̢̢͕̜̝̟͚͕̼̜̻̐͑͑̆̆͋̉̆͂͋͌͛͐̕͠h̵̡̠̻̬̣̝̮̰̪̫̺̟̯̮̀̀̇̀͐͑̚̚͝e̵̛̯̊̽̈́̇d̴̞̠̑̐̿̆̀̉͗͊͝ ̵̢̨̛̺̰̝͍̖̺͉̻̤̃̈́͐̆̌͂̑̍͜h̴̡̡̢͇̰͖̮̬̩́ͅi̵̡͚͍̖̝͉̺̲̲͔̣̤̩̐͑͊̊́̅̓͜͝͝͝ͅm̶̢̙͍̱̦̠̫͆̈̈̍͆̌͝ ̶̨͍̩͖̟͖̗͙͓̤̔̓̿̽͆̚ͅͅs̶̢͓̥͋́̈́͛̽̔̄͋̋̂̃́̕͠ͅt̷̡̡͎͔̳͙̖̞̻̭̦̰̊̐̔̑̋̕ͅă̴̯͔͔͇̪̝̦͕̗̦͎r̴̢̡̖͍̤̖̟̼̼͎͇̖͓͆̓͛ţ̶̭̼͖̥͎̗͓̰͍̲̖̲̾̌̾͛̔̀͛̃͝ ̶̨̘̠̝͔̯̳̯̉̍͐̃̇̎͠g̷̩͓̎̈́̏͆̅͆̿̅̋͝ŗ̷̡̗͍͚̳͙̠̱̺̌̄̓ơ̵̗͈͚͖̬͚̺̦̇̓̐̊͑̒͑͗̕̕͝͝w̵͍̣͖͓̥͌i̷̺͉̱̍̀̚n̷͉̓ǧ̵̪̙̠̪̫̺̒̎̈́͋͛̀͋͊̑̉̉̉͘ ̸̧̧̰̻͚̘̜̯̳̱̯̩̬͐̓̉̂̍̏͜f̷̣̠͑̆̓̏͒́̊͌̋̏̿́̕͝ě̵̺̭̆̉͋͌̔͒̃̌͛͋̕͝ả̴͉͇͔͍̜̺̼̩̻̤͚̮̗͙̐͆ͅt̶̡̛̬̖̩̖̰̭̒͗̇̀̍́̇͋̃͐̄̚͜͝h̴̜̫̞̭̋̀̒̎̑̉͒̔̓̐̕ë̴̢̧̧̛̗̹̟̱̳̻͉̤́̆̏r̶̡͇̰͕̼̰̺͗̉̐̚̕͠͝s̶̩̱̦̮̓͘͝ ̸̡̖̘̮͓̙́a̸̧̨̢̙̼͓͎̥̮͠n̷͓̳̟̠̺͖͂̓͜͝ḑ̸̤̣͚̦͈̦̥̰̬̠̠̐̿͆̈̉̇̉́͗̀̕͘͝͠ ̵̼̲͓̩͇̫̋͛̌̊͋̈́̉͜͜ȁ̵͍̝͉̞͎̗͆̆͂̓̈́͗̚͝͠ ̷̻̙̤͕̹͆͛̊̂̔̓͆ͅb̸̧̧͓͚͈̜̠̙̻̱͊͛̚̚ę̵̡͈̠̈͑͒̂̍a̵̻̾̃̓̋͌̐́͐̿̕ǩ̴͇͌̀̓́̀̕͠.̶̨̲̩͎͓̇̈́̇̈́̀̿̎̊͑̂̆̚

||The last thing I ever heard of this "boyfriend" bloke is a sad cockadoodledoo||